289. Redefining Giving Up

joshua-earle-64814Give Up: Dictionary definitionTo yield control or possession of ; surrender

Self-Introspective Writing:  Giving up to me means the mind directs me without my decision — that somewhere somehow I allowed me to give up my self directive power and control to the mind.

The mind consists of many dimensional layers (conscious, subconscious, unconscious…) as well as thoughts, backchats, internal conversations, and many more. If I allow these parts of me to ‘run amok’ and go on and on I am allowing the mind to take over and control me, and thus I have given up my power to stop. Though I understand and realize I can always stop and stand up, in any given moment… 

If I am existing and experiencing something I don’t like, that compromises me or makes me do things I don’t enjoy, I must question who I am within it all – did I agree to live and be like this? Do I agree with who I am? If no – then I STOP – I say/proclaim in me I do not accept and allow me to be like this, live like this… then I forgive me for existing in that part/existence of being, then I stand and decide who I am going to be with a living word.

Personal example: There was a child in my classroom who was really difficult, and I allowed experiences of feeling helpless, disempowerment to control me (thus I gave in / gave up in the mind). This is because I was not honest with myself in being straightforward in acknowledging yes, this child is difficult but I am going to find a way to work with them and find solutions so things can be less challenging between us. 

So, whenever challenges come my way, both internally and externally, instead of giving up / giving into the emotional experiences of helplessness, victimization, resistance, I instead JOIN IN ON THE CHALLENGE and do what I can to find stability and solutions.

In the context of my process, I redefine GIVING UP as: Giving my power / self directive principle to the mind, allowing it control / influence me in a way that compromises me / diminishes me / makes me feel bad about myself.

Self-Correction: When and as I see myself give my power / my authority of the mind to thoughts, backchats, emotions, judgements, etc, I did not agree nor decide to be/exist like this, because I see it is not best for me / compromises me, I stop, breathe, forgive and move me to redefine and live a new word.

I accept challenges, both within my mind as myself, and my external world. I stop resisting, hiding and fearing challenges. I instead take them on, embrace them, because my mind and life processes is all about challenges, learning and moving through with them.

Thanks for reading.

 

Recommended Resources:

EQAFE.com – Self-Perfection Merchandise

DIP Lite – Free Self-Development Course

School of Ultimate Living – Life Creation through Words

Self & Living – Fresh Insights into Self- Empowerment & Lifestyle Creation

 

Advertisements

285. A Personal Note on ”The Maker of Matter’

full_the-maker-of-matter-reptilians-part-562Essential real substantial change happens in the every day life moments. Otherwise we build and create more problems for ourselves because we are afraid of taking 100% responsibility for ourselves.

After listening to the Reptilians interview called Maker of Matter, I realize I am the Maker, I make and decide to live out/experience/act on my thoughts, insecurities without doing anything about it but allow myself to continue dragging through points without actually taking them on due to me personally wanting to keep me in a self-victimized helpless state. If I keep myself in that state it is as though I don’t have to take responsibility cause I am “so helpless! I’m in such a victimized state! Oh I have to do this and that! Oh no! Look at how shitty my life turned out to be…look at how these people and these situations/things left me in the state I am!” It’s not real and just an avoidance to taking full responsibility of who I am in realizing I have allowed events to unfold as is and I have created myself and my process as is up to this point because of acting/re-acting in a state of helplessness, self-victimization, “it’s not my fault! They did this to me!!” It’s bullshit really lol.

So realizing and identifying these two aspects in me of experiencing helplessness and self-victimization and the belief that I am not responsible nor capable enough to take responsibility for myself is just an excuse, an avoidance mechanism to not walk outside of the box and change, in my every day moments. Cool I flagged these two points – victimization and helplessness cause now I can see these are my “downfalls” and “weaknesses” that actually when they come up I can then move me to empower myself to learn more about who I am in these points and find the solution to change.

 

Additional Support

EQAFE.com – Self-Perfection Merchandise

Journey to Life Blogs – Walking the 7 Year Journey to Life

School of Ultimate Living – Life Creation through Words

DIP Lite – Free Self-Development Course

Relationship Course – Redefining Relationships

277. Solutions from a Teacher Towards Children Hitting/Abusing Each Other

michael-mims-130838I’m a Teacher Assistant in a kindergarten and recently I’ve been looking at my reaction in fear and stress when I see a child about to attack (before) or after the attack. The reaction comes from wanting to save the children and prevent, shelter them from abuse and harsh and sometimes violent behavior of children. Especially the ”innocent” who are so young/small and unaware of what is happening yet they will be victims of a child’s abuse.

The fact that bullying and hitting happens daily in the classroom makes me really concerned and worried for the wellbeing of the children. This is something I don’t want in the classroom, yet it is basically out of my control as I cannot control the children 100% and be aware of all the happenings of interactions at once to prevent everything bad/negative. Yes I have been able to stop things before they happened, but not all. I have spoken to many children during many conflicts, and yet the same behaviors happen over and over. There are a lot of factors to take into consideration about this: The happiness of the child, the way the situation/conflict is handled by the teacher, if the teacher has communicated the problem and solution well enough for the child to integrate it, parent-child relationship at home and relationship with conflict, social skills/lack of social skills…the list can go on as to the many reasons why a child hits and bullies in the classroom.

Looking at this more, I’ve come to see how we as adults exist in similar ways when it comes to harming others, like how children do – but in a more internal/controlled way. We allow ourselves to spite each other in our heads – saying mean things, imagining harming others because we’re upset and angry. Children are our reflection and do not have this control like us so they will act out on it in physical reality. Therefore, me reacting in fear is really pointless when I see children harming each other, either through thought, word and deed because on levels in me I must do the same.

Then it’s best to just get right to action in being able to deal with the aftermath of the conflict and find ways/solutions for such situations to be prevented in the classroom.

Self-Forgiveness & Commitment Statements

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react in fear and stress moments before I see a child hit or abuse another child as revenge towards something they are feeling/experiencing on an internal level. I realize that this type of response of revenge is our human nature, though not to be justified that it’s ok to exist in this, as seeking revenge or wanting to harm others when one feels a part of them is threatened allows the continuation of abuse on life on earth.

When and as I see myself feeling like a part of me is threatened and I want to seek revenge by making someone feel less / become weakened, I stop, I breathe and I understand what do I feel weakened in/threatened about,  and find solutions on how to direct the situation and strengthen my weakness so that I can exist in integrity and not cause unnecessary consequences

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react in fear and stress to the aftermath of when a child is hit or harmed because I fear they are going to be traumatized forever from that instead of realizing it is trauma enough the child has to live in a world where the humans around them exist on a mind consciousness level and not on a pure, physical life level, and thus have to deal with the words and actions from others who speak, act and think from consciousness instead of oneness and equality as life.

I commit myself to stand as an example for the children and children to come to stop participating in thoughts, emotions and ideas and instead understand them, direct them, clear them so that I can stand as a being not influenced by the mind as consciousness but stands for life

WORDS TO LIVE: Being an Example (for the children) of another way to live/be

I forgive myself thatI have accepted and allowed myself to react in fear toward the thought of the children are being traumatized from the accumulation of children hitting and abusing in the environment, instead of realizing this is just an idea I have, that I do not know how much a child can handle or process, and that taking care of my own reactions toward this point by not giving into fear is much more important – because each time I participate in fear with this idea, I am imprinting this into me and the physical, allowing such fears to continue and even manifest in the physical

I commit myself to stop thinking children are getting traumatized by the hitting and verbal abuse and instead realize the real trauma comes from consciousness and thus best for me to be purified of that, while finding solutions as a teacher/staff member to educate children on the consequences of their actions 

Additional Support

Journey to Life Blogs – Walking the 7 Year Journey to Life

School of Ultimate Living – Life Creation through Words

DIP Lite – Free Self-Development Course

EQAFE.com – Self-Perfection Merchandise

Relationship Course – Redefining Relationships

268. Emotional Manipulation vs. Being Self-Aware

alnqdp3b3yu-naomi-augustI’ve been working and practicing becoming more aware on Emotional Manipulation – in myself and to others. And it is really sad and shameful to see how much of this pattern I’ve allowed to exist and influence me…Like in my relationship to my partner where through my facial movements and tonalities I can see how I try to move/persuade/manipulate my partner to do something or be a certain way.

Upon realizing how I live this pattern today, it was quite shocking and I wanted to avoid seeing this as it is quite  nasty, uncomfortable part I exist in, but also quite a gift because now I see how much of this pattern is me and has been with me for quite some time, so I can actually start changing it.

How I started to open up the point of Emotional Manipulation came from a week where it felt like everything in me became unsteady, emotional and intense. I had for some time been able to move and stabilize and take responsibility of points when they come up, and redefine words, but then it became difficult, I became difficult to direct me.

This is because my mind to an extent saw I was becoming good at moving and directing myself – really becoming directive principle, so it had to up its game. According to the Emotional Victimization series by the Atlanteans, when the mind sees you are becoming ”too good” at directing yourself and your emotions, it will up its game to make you fall back into being its slave. Well, it did a pretty good job throwing out all these intense emotional experiences and thoughts in me – and unfortunately at that time I did not understand why or could see it coming – the Mind can be so sneaky and clever – so I got lost in the experiences until I sought help through EQAFE.com to help me understand what is going on.

And lo and behold, through the Emotional Victimization interviews I discovered so much more about myself and my relationship to thoughts and emotions, and from this got to understand more on how I emotionally manipulate myself and how that effects me, my life and my relationships around me. It was a good wake up call for me because I got to uncover a very serious and detrimental pattern that is the foundation of self-sabotage, a pattern that needs to be stopped and corrected in me.

And it is also interesting to mention that even before writing this blog I went into the emotions of ”I don’t know what to write about!” but I caught this immediately – emotional manipulation – my own creation was coming up by throwing these justifications and tantrums, but as the interviews said – do not allow yourself to give in to that – stand by your decision to not accept and allow your thoughts and emotions to manipulate YOU. This was a biggie for me – the importance of sticking to yourself, your stand of not being wavered or moved by the thoughts and emotional experiences inside but to move/direct you according to what is best for you in principle.

It is still a point I am practicing – strengthening my stand to not be moved by my thoughts and emotions, but to stand up with me and what I stand for – which is to be directive principle of myself, within the principles of oneness and equality – that which is best for all. It is super empowering to be able to stand with you and your decision to not accept and allow yourself to be emotionally manipulated by your own thoughts and experiences.

 

 

Additional Resources:

Journey to Life Blogs – Walking the 7 Year Journey to Life

School of Ultimate Living – Life Creation through Words

DIP Lite – Free Self-Development Course

EQAFE.com – Self-Perfection Merchandise

Relationship Course – Redefining Relationships

 

 

263. The Me in Process

photo-1427324301858-41039f1e0c32I’ve been inspired by Dan’s blog: Self-Agreement and Anna’s Living the Word Me, so will write a similar topic of my own 🙂

ME has also been a word I’ve been using as a bridge-support-word when I see myself in a consciousness mind point, such as backchat, and I want to go into the self-sabotage point of giving up/not directing myself, so I’ve been practicing when I see myself in this self-sabotage mind consciousness system point, I bring up the word ME, in the agreement and realization I actually as ME want to do this/walk this process/want to suppot me and stop this sabotage.

So I will move from consciousness as existing in backchats for example, to bringing up the word ME, in establishing that starting point of doing this process for me, (because it’s actually something I want to do!!! I want to better myself, create a better me, better life for me and all) and then I move myself to the appropriate self-forgiveness.

I will share some Self-Forgiveness that came up for me when I was experiencing fear. I looked at ME and saw what would be most supportive was to write out SF tonight:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to walk my process in fear because I don’t want to end up in consequence of NOT walking it

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realise that if I fear consequence for not walking process, and walk as that fear, then my starting point is not real, not for me, genuinely and thus walking process from/within fear will not work in the end

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear not getting or being given the chance to walk process again because of the idea I already fucked up, instead of accepting my position here, and realizing I am still here, breathing, thus I still have the opportunity to walk and correct myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel like process is so daunting, and scary due to the absoluteness that it entails, meaning, you either walk process for yourself or not, and that when you face life you must stand equal/absolute to it or not, and that is it. I realize it is so because life will not accept anything less of itself, and it’s about time life comes through in existence, and that actually, it is best for me and for all to stand up for life, because it is what I want and for everyone to have!

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear the absoluteness of life because to me that means no more deceiving, bullshitting, hiding, avoiding, but taking responsibility and directing yourself to/as your utmost of what you can be. I realize it is so easy to fall into the trap of self-interest because I’ve/we’ve been existing as such for SO MANY YEARS it is going to take dedication and commitment to create oneself into/as Life. I realize I must embrace and accept what is here, as me, as the manifestation of me as the world, as what I see and from that ACCEPTANCE, can then move and change

Acceptance has been a word I’ve been living today – accepting my reality, accepting process and where I’m at. I know once you get to that point of acceptance, you can only move forward to change.

I commit to actually really walk me within self-support, self-love, doing this process for me, for real, changing myself that will support in changing the world

I commit myself to live the word ACCEPTANCE – accepting my reality as is, accepting where I am as is, because it is REAL in fact, and because who I am in the moment is real, and what I see in reality is real, I must accept it as is yet MOVE myself from this acceptance into self-change, practically by walking through each point/thought/backchat personality of my mind that does not serve me, nor support me in creating my best self, and move into correcting the past and creating new

I commit myself to use the word ME as a bridge between self-sabotage and support, where when I see myself want to avoid, blame, justify and/or hide from not taking responsibility of my mind/directing my points, I use the word ME as the reminder of why I want to walk this process, and as that Me of/as self-support, move to the necessary forgiveness, writing, or whatever I see supportive in the moment. I do this process for ME, as what is best for ME and all.

 

Additional Resources:

Journey to Life Blogs – Walking the 7 Year Journey to Life

School of Ultimate Living – Life Creation through Words

DIP Lite – Free Self-Development Course

EQAFE.com – Self-Perfection Merchandise

Relationship Course – Redefining Relationships