Day 214: The Problem with Alcohol at Parties

I got invited to a party the other day and I was really looking forward to checking it out there. It was going to be my first party here in Vienna and I was going to meet many internationals also living in this city. I was also able to bring my partner with me which was cool.

When I got there I noticed that the party was basically held in a restaurant with many tables and chairs set up with a bar but no dance floor. So basically everyone there was simply talking and drinking alcohol, and that was it.

I see it as a shame that we as humanity allow ourselves to set up and participate in these parties where we all resort to drinking alcohol because that is how we see ‘fun’ but I don’t see fun as that. I see fun at parties as being able to be oneself, express oneself with others, dance around, have interesting conversations with people without being influenced by alcohol, but we have over time programmed and conditioned ourselves throughout our history as humans in this world/society to connect alcohol to ‘fitting in,’ ‘having fun’ or ‘partying’ while we suppress our own expression within this substance. In fact we can feel paralyzed/fearful around others and unable to be ourselves at parties/gatherings, that is why we give into alcohol to either ‘help’ us in loosening ourselves up/being relaxed within who we are, or bring out a more rambunctious outgoing side that we normally suppress in our day to day living.

This is why I find education on how to be able to be ourselves/bring out our self-expression around others and at parties without the need for alcohol/external substance is important because then we are directive principles, being able to be okay with ourselves, decide who we are and how we want to be/live in our lives instead of allowing a substance to decide for us or influence who we should be, feel and do. In this regard, one can take the  Desteni I Process ‘Lite’ course or go on the Desteni Forum to help one establish an awareness of becoming directive principle of your life.

I know me and my partner are a very rare couple compared to the many other couples and individuals in this world at parties because of our choice to not drink alcohol. We understand the impact and influence it has to not only our minds, but our bodies. If it is suggested or mandatory to order some drink at a party or dinner I order a non-alcohol drink like a fruit juice with soda water (it’s quite delicious, give it a shot sometime).

Here are some blogs in relation to the effects of alcohol on the mind and body and how to support yourself to stop the habit/addiction:

One Year of NO ALCOHOL
Alcohol, Drugs and Demon Possession
My Addiction to Alcohol, Sleeping Meds and Porn
Alcohol is the Corporate Psychologist
Where Does Your Responsibility Go When You’re Drunk?
Zero Point and Other Points – Alcohol 
Alcohol and Humanity — Intelligence?

Google Hangout Video:
What They Didn’t Tell You About Alcohol Addiction!

Forum Thread:
The Design of Alcohol

Alcohol in New Relationships
Alcohol Poisoning
Life Review: Words, Behavior, Alcohol
Death Research: Words, Behavior, Alcohol

”I have not had alcohol for a year and a bit more now, I have gone to a bar with friends and people from my past, and I just drank seltzer water and ice. They ask ‘what, you don’t drink anymore? why not?’ in great shock, this amused me somewhat, but also, I realize that this is just programmed behavior. We are so programmed to see people drinking, having alcohol be accepted as the way to relax and enjoy friends as it’s on every other commercial and pushed in tv and movies, but really if we have a self honest look, it’s just a way for corps. to make money while we go to shit. Many deaths are caused, people go out of control, no common sense is practiced, and its really all just bullshit and not needed. I realized I could be an example to show we don’t need to drink to enjoy here, alcohol is not needed to have a good time, and it can be stopped. I suggest use what has been said in this thread to write out self honestly why you drink. Drinking alcohol is an abuse to life and does nothing to support what is here and what is best for all.” –-Garbrielle on the Desteni Forum

Educational & Supportive Websites:
Journey to Life Blogs:     Personal Journeys of Self-Discovery  Free Self-Improvement Interviews
DIP Lite:  Free Self-Development Online Course
Desteni I Process: Online Self-Mastery Course at it’s Finest
Relationship Agreement Course: Empower Yourself, Strengthen your Relationships
Desteni Website  Understanding the Human Mind, Oneness & Equality
Desteni Wiki Structured, Organized Information about Self & Solutions
Desteni Forum  Forum with interactive support, resources and tools 

Day 170: Why Am I So Tired When I Hang out with Friends? Part 2

My problem I am facing is not wanting to walk this point of understanding why I get so tired when I’m around this friend, S, of mine. I identified a part of it is because I am insecure about sharing what I see and know to my friend, being open and honest about me, and I must ask myself, well then, why am I still friends with her if I am unable to be myself? To express myself?

From what I understand through an Atlantean interview I listened to, tiredness can be a result of stress, fear and/or anxiety. This makes sense to me because when I am with my friend, S, I do see myself go into these reactions.

One fear that comes up is that if I were to talk/by myself we would have nothing in common and that our values would clash. This is so because what pops up is how she’s into sports and alcohol, and I’m not, but this defines her in limitation because we do have many things in common actually. What I want to do for myself, is next time when I hang out with her, to speak up more, within consideration of my friend/her mind/process and see where it takes me, because otherwise, if I suppress myself or believe that I shouldn’t speak of something for in fear of getting into conflict or having me and my friend ‘clash’ I am compromising myself, suppressing myself, and allowing my fears to ‘win.’

I see I am afraid of the conflict or reactions or the uncomfortable feelings/reactions I would experience if I were to be open and honest about me to my friend. What I will do for myself is to write out a list of the fears I have, identify memories, and then walk self-forgiveness on these fears.

Fears & Memories:

1) Afraid that what I share, specifically points of the world/humanity will be criticized/disagreed with (memory of my sister in the car comes up, memory of me in the car with C and thinking my friend isn’t interested in what I’m talking about and feeling insecure)

2) Afraid of her rejecting me as a friend/not wanting to hang out with me anymore because “we’ve had a long friendship” and “she is the only friend I have.”

These and more points I will walk within the next blog posts sharing my Self-Forgiveness and Self-Realizations. In the meantime, take a listen to this interview below:

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Day 165: Anxiety Underneath the Desire to Control

Continuing from: Day 164: Emotional Starting Point = Emotional Outcome

“…it turned out the person wasn’t able to get the information I wanted to know about, so I reacted in anger towards them. I was angry — I expected them to retrieve the information I needed today. Since I wasn’t able to physically go and get the information about this event at this specific building, I trusted this person to do it for me. So they said they forgot and mentioned other points in relation to why they didn’t get the information but within me I couldn’t let the anger go. To me it felt right and justifiable to get angry at them – I had for days reminded them about this point and they still didn’t follow through so this led to a conflictual morning for me where I resisted talking to and being with them.”

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react in anger when another did not do the job I requested and urged for them to do instead of realizing that I had urged this person to do the job within anxiety and thus, was speaking and existing in a point of energy as reaction which indicate that I was not the directive principle here but moved myself within and from energy within my mind consciousness system.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be angry at another when they did not do what I asked them to do due to the belief that I am helpless and do not have the means or skills to seek out what I would like to know.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become angry at another when they did not do what I wanted and from this,I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be angry over the fact that I cannot control the person to do what I want them to do.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be angry at not being able to control the person to do what I want them to do.

So the question within this is why? What is it that I want to control so much? I see, going back to square one was that I wanted to hide my anxiety through trying to force/control another to do the thing that I believed/perceived would be the point to stop/soothe my anxiety, which was to see if I needed to attend this event or not, and yet when my plan/expectation did not go through (I did not get the news/information today) I reacted in anger – I realize I have to wait and so existed within impatience because I want my answer NOW, I want the information NOW so I will know if I need to attend this event or not and then take the steps immediately so I can calm down this anxiety.

Will continue with more in the next post…

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