232. Opening Up Jealousy – Part 2 – Wants & Desires

 Continuing from:
231. Opening Up Jealousy – Part 1

”So how to stop nature of competition is to let go of primary self interest of wants, needs, desires and how you would manipulate your world and reality through and as jealousy.” –The Origin and Nature of Jealousy

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire and want the same opportunities as X, meaning, the fame and the attention that they through their work/online activity
through attending luxurious events and going on paid trips and participating in activities that I find fun and exciting and become jealous of X because I am not able to do or experience what they do

From this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become jealous of X for being how they are, meaning – pretty and thin and attractive where they get opportunities to travel, go abroad and meet new people — things that I cannot physically be and do and from this I realize that X is only 1% of the people in this world who gets these opportunities, who has these events to attend to, who has the beauty/appearance and skills that gives them these glamorous/exciting/luxurious opportunities that I want but cannot have at the moment

From this I realize that because they are 1% the other 99% of this world live less-than-optimum lives considering the state of this world and the world economic system, that not everyone is able to enjoy and attend exciting/luxurious/glamorous events like X does, and within this I see, realize and understand that getting jealous over X and their travels/attendance to such glamorous/exciting/luxurious events only happens to the 1%, to the select few who get chosen/invited by select companies and organizations from which all of this then contributes to separation and the inequality that exists today where everyone else — the 99% — do not get to enjoy and attend these glamorous/luxurious/exciting events because they do not fit with what the company/organizations want/need

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become angry at X and others who are able to attend free events where they get to eat free delicious food, try on free makeup/clothes at their liking, meet and greet with celebrities, travel to places for free, go to luxurious spas and hotels for free — basically, people who are able to live and taste the luxurious life because I want to be able to experience such a life but am not at this moment, as well as the majority of human beings in this world, and so from this I realize it is best to just let this go and to realize that  only opportunities come to the select few, the 1% while the other 99% have to work hard and go through much hardships to get by in life, which of course is not fair but this is how the world is and works currently…it is what we have allowed

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become angry at the thought that ”it could have been me” being able to explore and experience a luxurious life that I see X does, where they meet with skilled and famous people, travel to different countries free, go to different fancy hotels, where I think and believe that ”could have been me” if I were able to be in their shoes and do what they do, that I could have the same life as them if I were to change some things in my life, not realizing how they got to where they are now is due to many factors and opportunities that came into their life, many things and points that came together to get to where they are now that I cannot copy or imitate or reenact because it’s organic and unique and is what came to them, something which I cannot copy or get because it happened to them in its own unique way

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react emotionally in anger to the thought ”It’s not fair that X gets to do that!” to the activities and events they get to explore and attend because I want to explore and travel and discover new places and meet new people, desires and wants that I want fulfilled however, with how current reality runs, especially since the money system does not allow everyone to live out and fulfill their dreams, I must come back to earth and remain practical and humble with what I’m doing, to focus more on how I can use my skills and voice to contribute to creating a world best for all, where all would be able to live a life of luxury as the final result, because yes, it is not fair/cool that 1% get to live fun exciting luxurious lives while the 99% live in less-than-optimal conditions and lives

So from this I see that I am reacting emotionally to the reality of inequality/unfairness of certain people being able to experience certain luxurious/glamorous/exciting lives because I know and believe I am just as capable and skilled as them to deserve to go to these places and experience a luxurious/exciting/glamorous life place myself in their shoes. I realize it is only a select few able to taste this kind of life, and if you are picked to attend such an event you are lucky out of the many, you are the ”fortunate” one. Yet in the end, these events– do they really matter? Sure you  had fun and it was exciting, but did anything substantial come out of it? We are all going to die someday and face what we’ve done… so is what I’m doing now going to benefit me and others and that which is best for all? Those are some questions I’m going to ask myself to keep myself within focus and humbleness towards what I’m doing in my life.

Self-Corrective Statements and Commitments to come.

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224: To Become a Leader…

I got the chance to organize an event for international women to come together, meet and make new friends at a nice restaurant. Since I was the organizer I got there early and planned to make sure I greet everyone who comes, as well as say goodbye, and get to know as many women as I could. This opportunity also allowed me to make new friends in the city I am living in, which is really cool!

So, there are many points I’d like to share that I have discovered and realized when I attended this event, but I will take one point and write about it in its own post blog over a series of blog about becoming a leader, or an effective organizer of a group. Because since I am the leader/creator/organizer of the group, I realize I have a lot of responsibility, not only from a managerial side, but from a standing-within-principle side, where it is my duty and responsibility to treat each member of this group the way I would like to be treated, and to become the organizer/leader of the group that stands within principles of what is best for all. This means, no judging of any member, speaking within support and never gossip, accepting and welcoming all who are interested, and stopping any form of comparison or competition within me.

Because I have seen these points come up in my face as I interacted with the ladies in the group. I saw how my mind went into judgement, into comparison, into not feeling good enough/self esteem issues, into worry about people not liking me, into competition towards other woman… points that I saw that are not cool and not what should exist in an organizer/leader of a group.

I met with an individual the other day and thought that they were very judgmental and it made me realize that I don’t want to be like that as a person/leader. Then later someone assisted me to see how I within that had actually done exactly that — I was judging the other person for judging, which I didn’t see when I was in the situation –  thus showing me exactly that what I had seen in another still exists in myself and I could confirm the realization that: that this is not the kind of leader I want to be, and  I still have work to do in myself to create myself as the leader I want to be.

So — I am going to from here on start a blog series focusing on becoming and creating myself into an organizer/leader that stands and exists within the principles of what is best for all.

Educational & Supportive Websites:
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Day 193: My Declaration of Principle

Here are the commitments of Destonian Principles that I am walking so I become them totally. It is a declaration and commitment of what it means to be a Destonian and the principles one lives by.

As I continue to walk my Journey to life blog I will in time take one point/principle and write it within how I see it/interpret it, and show how I applied it or will apply it practically in my world.

1.    Realising and living my utmost potential

2.    Living by the principle of what is best for all – guiding me in thought, word and deed to always in all ways direct problems to the best possible outcome for all

3.    Living by the principle of self honesty – to ensure I am pure in thought, word and deed: that my within and without is equal and one. Who I am within is who I am without and vice-versa

4.    Self Purification through Writing, Self Forgiveness and Self Application – the action of realising I am responsible for my own thoughts, words and deeds, to forgive myself for transgressions and change myself to ensure I take responsibility for who, what and how I am and through this know that I can trust myself to always be honest with me and so others

5.    Living the principle of Self Responsibility – realising only I am responsible for what I accept and allow inside of me, my relationships and my outside world and so with this responsibility: only I have the power and ability to change that which I see is compromising who I am, what I live and how this affects others

6.    Realising that who I am in thought, word and deed affects not only myself – but others as well and so with Self Responsibility in thought, word and deed – I take responsibility for myself and so my relationships to be Self Aware in every moment  and live in such a way that is best for me and so others as well

7.    Living the Principle of Self Awareness – to be aware, to see, to recognize my own thoughts and Mind, to be self honest to the extent where I can take responsibility for when I see my thoughts / Mind is not what is best for me / others and commit to immediately take responsibility and change for myself and so for others

8.    With taking responsibility for myself, becoming aware of myself – take responsibility and become aware of others in my life, to assist and support them as I am assisting and supporting myself – to give as you would like to receive and do the extra bit every day to see where I can contribute to other’s lives and so my own

9.    Living the principle of self trust – as I commit myself to remain constant in my living of self honesty, self responsibility and self awareness, I stand as an unbending trust that I always in all ways know who I am no matter what I face and that in this I know, as proven in the constancy of my living that I will always honour and stand by what is best for all and so best for me

10.    Making Love Visible – through me not accepting/allowing anything less than my utmost potential, I support those in my life to reach their utmost potential, to love them as I have shown love to myself by gifting to me my utmost potential, the best life/living experience and show others as I have shown myself what is means to LIVE

11.    No one can save you, save yourself – the realisation that the tools and principles of Desteni is the guide, but I must walk the path myself. We are here to assist and support each other in this process from Consciousness to Awareness/LIFE and what it means to live – but the process itself, where you are alone with yourself in your own Mind: is walked alone

12.    Not waiting for anything or anyone to take responsibility for me and this world – but that I realise I have created who and how I am in this moment, therefore I have the responsibility to change who and how I am and so the realisation that we as a collective created how and what this world is today and so it is the responsibility of the collective to change how and what this world is today

13.    Honouring the life in each person, animal – everything from the great to the small of earth, that we expand our awareness and responsibility to creating the best possible life for everyone and everything and so ourselves

14.    Relationships as Agreements: individuals coming together using agreements as a platform to one-on-one expand, grow and develop as individuals in life and living to support/assist each other unconditionally to reach their utmost potential where the agreement is a coming together of individuals understanding what it means to stand as equals and to stand as one

15.    Sex as Self Expression – where sex is an united expression between individuals in honour, respect, consideration and regard of each other as equals, two physical bodies uniting in equality and oneness – a merging of two equals as one physically.

16.    Realising that by the virtue of me being in this world – my responsibility does not only extend to my own Mind / my own Life, but to the minds and lives of everything and everyone of this earth and so my commitment is to extend this awareness to all of humanity to work together and live together to make this world heaven on earth for ourselves and the generations to come

17.    I must in my thoughts, words and deeds – but most importantly in my living actions, become a living example for others in my world that is noticeable and visible when it comes to the potential of a person to change themselves and so change their world. So that more people can realise how we can change this world, by standing united in our self change within the principle of what is best for all to bring heaven to earth

18.    I am the change I want to see in me and my world – to bring heaven to earth is to bring into being, into living the LIVING PROOF of a PRACTICAL HEAVEN that can be seen and heard in our actions and words. We are the Living Heaven that must come into creation in this living world.

19.    Through purifying my thoughts, words and deeds – my inner becomes my outer, so I bring into creation me as heaven into earth, realising it is not enough to ‘see the change / be the change’ – for change to become REAL it must be a constant, consistent living of me through the words I speak and the actions I live visible and noticeable to all in every moment of breath

20.    Realising that my physical body is my temple – my physical body is the living flesh through which and in which I will bring into being and create / manifest heaven on earth as me in my thoughts, words and deeds and so I honour, respect and regard – nurture and support my physical body as I would nurture and support me as equals: my body is me

21.    We are the change in ourselves and this world we have been waiting for: and so I commit to dedicate myself and my life for each one as all to realise this, as nothing will change if we don’t change in all that we are, within and without

22.    The realisation that for me to be able to change myself in thought, word and deed to the most effective living being that I can be and become – I first have to ‘know thyself’ and so commit myself to investigate, introspect and understand how I became who I am today, to prepare the road before me into self creation of a responsible, aware, self honest and trustworthy person for myself and so for all

23.    The realisation that for me to be able to contribute to change in this world – I have to get to ‘know thyself’ as this world and so commit myself to research, investigate and introspect the inner and outer workings of this world and align the systems of today to present and give the best possible life for all on Earth

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Day 113: Spending More Time on the Phone than with Our Partner

The study found we now spend more time on our smartphones than with our partner, with the average Brit spending two hours a day looking at their phone

From: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2333261/We-spend-MORE-time-phones-partner.html

We now spend more time on our smartphones than with our partner, according to a new study.

The average smartphone user tends to spend two hours (119 minutes) a day using their gadget.
Yet, the amount of time we spend with our other halves per day is just 97 minutes – a third less – on average.
David Johnson, (from mobile phone provider O2) said: “Smartphones are getting smarter all the time with huge leaps being made in technology. However, that’s also meant we’re now spending more time glued to the screen rather than gazing into our partners’ eyes
‘We’re seeing a new generation of phones that react more readily to their users and have truly become home entertainment devices.”   -DailyMail.co.uk

It’s common to see people, especially the youth on their cell phones/iPhones/iPads playing games, texting, checking up on social media — you get to know what’s new, what’s going on, what’s the latest drama, who’s dating who… and yet we can be so consumed with what’s going on in the cyber world we forget that there’s a real world in front of our eyes.

We need to shift our focus from/of consumerism and materialism to life and practical living. We are spending too much time on our phones/electronic devices and less time developing real relationships, real communication and practical living skills. I mean – just from listening to the Relationship Success interviews on EQAFE I realize there is so much to learn about relationships alone!

Wouldn’t it be nice if everyone treated each other the way they would like to be treated?  I say we need to reform our education system into a system Best for All where for example we have practical life-skills classes that provide assistance and support to everyone on how to effectively work with oneself and others in the environment.

Fortunately, there is a start: There is a free online life-skills course anyone can take.
Check it out here at: lite.desteniiprocess.com

Plus for those in relationships, there is an online course on developing effective communication, physical intimacy and practical living skills with your partner here at: http://desteniiprocess.com/courses/relationships

Till next time…

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Day 69: Fear of Moving / Living / Working in Another Country

The Secret Behind Addictions – http://bit.ly/10a8J5J – By Marlen Vargas Del Razo

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to go into anxiety thinking about finding a job in a new country where I don’t even know how to get a job there and instead of actually taking the time to research how to get a job in the country I go into fear.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear venturing into a new country on my own instead of taking the time I have now to PREPARE MYSELF to go off into a new country so that by the time I am ready to move I am confident in how I will approach the finding-a-job point in the new country.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use fear and anxiety about finding a job in a new country to prevent me from actually taking the time to do what I see is required to move, live and work there: research, contacting people, contacting schools, looking up visa information, making sure I am eligible to work there, etc because I see moving to a new country and working there will take a lot of effort on my part to make sure that I get there safely and confidently.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear moving, working and living in a new country because it’s something I’ve never done before on my own –

and I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to remember and accept within that I was able to make it a whole month in Prague by myself as I went by myself to go to school there and met with American students and was able to form connections and therefore –

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to underestimate myself when it comes to moving, living and working abroad because I already have proof that I was able to move, live and work in a country by myself for a month just fine.

So I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to approach moving to a new country in fear, fearing that I won’t be able to survive in the new country and will struggle and cry and be unhappy instead of seeing these are IDEAS and are NOT REAL and is actually manipulating me to not stay here and DO WHAT NEEDS TO BE PRACTICALLY DONE to assist and support myself in moving to the new country in confidence and stability.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to really throw me around in the Mind with participating in imaginary situations in my head of fears and play-outs of me struggling in another country, crying, wanting to go home, fearing the world because “the system is just too hard” and “I cannot live on my own.”

From this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to manipulate myself to go into fear about moving / living / working in another country by participating in the fears and imaginary play-outs of situations that could threaten my financial stability which lead me to becoming unsure about myself and my future of moving / living / working in another country because I see, realize and understand I am paying more attention to what’s going on in my head as my fears and concerns instead of practically walking myself through the steps of gathering the necessary knowledge and information to ensure that I am able to move / live / work in another country effectively.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to entertain myself in my Mind with all the fears and imaginary play-outs of what could happen if I were to be struggling in another country in which I see I generate even more fear as I continue participating in those fears and imaginary play-outs and thus no real solution comes forth, so I see I am deliberately holding myself back from taking a new opportunity such as moving / living / working in another country due to placing attention on illusionary fears that are playing out in my head.

I commit myself to research how to get a job in the country I decided to work in.

I commit myself to use the time I have now to prepare myself for my move to another country by contacting people, contacting schools, researching the area / country and visa information, etc.

I commit myself to utilize the knowledge and information that my parents have about working in the system, specifically working abroad / in a new country since they have had experience.

I commit myself to look back in how I made it through my time at school in Prague and how I was able to “get by” and utilize the resources I had during that time to gain confidence in what I will be walking in the future.

I commit myself to investigate the back-chat of “the system is too hard” and “I can’t live on my own” through writing, self forgiveness and self corrective application to stop allowing these words to influence and control me.

I commit myself to stop participating in the imaginary play-outs, fears and concerns that go on in my head about me moving / living / working in another country as I see, realize and understand that I am deliberately holding myself back from taking a new opportunity such as moving / living / working in another country due to placing attention on illusionary fears and allowing these fears to control me and stop me from doing the necessary research to actually move / live / work in another country effectively.

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