Today I was going through old lesson plans that I made when I first started teaching. Within the lesson plans my instructor at the time wrote down comments and made notes on my teaching presentation / instruction . The notes my instructor wrote down about me were very thorough and direct and provided suggestions on improvements. Upon seeing the notes / comments I went into fear and a major resistance to even look at them.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear facing my instructor’s notes on my teaching presentation / instruction because I realize that he is directly making notes on me and my performance and therefore, I see, realize and understand that within those notes is feedback on my teaching such as what I require working on and improving, and from this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to to fear facing embarrassment and humiliation about my teaching presentation / instruction through the instructor’s comments as I realize that within reading his comments I am facing my mistakes that another has pointed out to me.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear facing my mistakes that another has pointed out to me, indicating what I did not do well on and need to improve on, pointing out suggestions on what to do to correct it – instead of seeing, realizing and understanding that the instructor feedback on my teaching presentation / instruction is essential in understanding how I can correct my mistakes as a teacher as well as develop myself into an effective teacher. From this – I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to take my instructor’s comments about my teacher presentation / instruction personally as I realize that the instructor was being direct, open and honest about my teaching style / presentation / instruction and therefore, used his knowledge and expertise to assist me in seeing where I may have been off and / or need adjustments and corrections in my teaching presentation / instruction.
I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to face my instructor’s comments about my teaching presentation / instruction full on within the realization that I am here and reading these comments is a point of support for me in understanding where I may still require correction in my teaching and that these notes are here to support me in my development as a teacher, and therefore, there is no need to take another’s comments towards my presentation personally as the instructor was simply doing his job – observing and taking notes on my teaching presentation / instruction and utilizing his knowledge and expertise to suggest what I need to work on. I mean – how else am I going to develop, learn and grow as a teacher if I don’t accept others perspectives and suggestions on developing my teaching style? I realize that having my instructor as an observer was cool in that he was able to catch and see things I wasn’t aware of when I was teaching.
I will continue more on this point tomorrow. Thank you.